Feminism at 3 am

Fifty-four percent of marriages now end in divorce. It is my belief that women being introduced into the major work-force is responsible for this. Now, before you feminist bitches start verbally raping me for my theory, hear me out and don't get your shoulder pads all in a bunch.

I am among the class of "business women" that are ruining the institution of marriage. I bring home the bacon, attend to our personal finances and make all of the major purchase decisions in my marriage. Because of this- my marriage is strained. My husband is constantly (even if inadvertantly) immasculated. He makes a decent income, but will never be able to attain the type of salary that I'm accostomned to. Although he's more intelligent, stronger and more able- he lacks the charisma and enormous tits that have propelled his wife up the corporate ladder. It's a sad and unfortunate truth.

Starting in the 1950's, less than 5% of marriages ended in divorce, and less than 8% of married women had a job or career outside of the home. Compare that to 2005 where 82% of married women make their own money and 54% of marriages ended in divorce. Most people feel that the break down of moral values and lack of religion is the main reason for this. Although it's hard to disagree with that- there aren't the hard numbers to back it up.

Let's just take a look at a woman's day in 1952. I spoke with my Grandmother, (who was one of the first women to attend business college in Springfield, Il), who gave me a break-down of what life was before she started her career in banking. She stayed at home and took care of her children, learned important skills like cooking, sewing, and keeping the home in order. When her husband got off work, the kids were already doing their homework, dinner was on the table, the house was immaculate and she was wearing a dress and heels. He came home to a perfectly organized house five days a week. No matter how intense things were at the office, he would arrive at a vacation type of home- every night. She enjoyed this. There were no nannies ( at least not for the middle class) and women took pride in their daily chores. She said she remembers having everything for dinner ready and putting on her fake eyelashes just in time for him to walk through the door. Her husband would be relieved to come home to such a pleasant situation and they were happy. (This was before he started drinking and putting out cigarrette butts on my Mother's arm). However, you can see how this type of environment would prolong even the most unstable of marriages. Both spouses saw each other in the best of lights. There wasn't any worry about who was watching the kids, or how you didn't have enough time to make dinner.

Now, let's fast-forward to 2009. I leave for work at six A.M and come home around 7pm. My husband will leave at 9 am and arrive back around 5:30pm. He comes home to a dirty house with no dinner and his wife still an hour commute away. The house is a mess because I was at work long before he even woke up. So, then I arrive home to a messy house, no dinner and a husband on the couch grumbling about his hunger pains. Immediately we're at each others throats. I eventually make dinner, go to the gym, straighten up the house, feed the pets and pay our bills online. I basically do all of the things I would have done in 1952, but in a third of the time and also support us financially.

Why WOULD 52% of women stay married in this situation? It's a brutal truth that men and women used to RELY on one another. Without a women, the home would fail, without a man- the house would. There's a signifigant difference, but both were of equal importance. Now, I don't really need a man to do any of those things. I can do it all myself and still have time to take a bath and read up on invitro-fertilization.

My husband and I have come to terms with our world and made decisions to ensure our longevity as a couple. He does the stereotypical "man" chores (ie- taking out the garbage) and I attempt to promote an overwhelming sense of femininity. I do my hair and makeup before he gets home, wear dresses as often as possible and put an emphasis on enhancing my cooking abilities. But it's not easy, and there are times when I wonder why I should bother at all.

It's not entirely the fault of the feminist movement. It wasn't like Rosie the riveter doomed us all to singledom. The way the we changed as a country ( SUV's, internet, blackberrys) and what we started putting stock in has had an enormous impact. Women wouldn't need to remain in the work-place if those silly things weren't considered nessescary to life. I am just as much to blame as anybody.

Lately, I've been thinking of a place I visited often in college. Rural southern Illinois towns where fashion and blackberrys really don't matter. I wouldn't need to bring home 85k a year to support the lifestyle that's held in high regard. It's a simpler place with 1 gas station, a church and 2 resturaunts (if you're lucky). This is the type of town my grandmother grew up in - as many of our grandparents. Everything was just...slower and smaller. The inevitable of the 1950s has become the american dream of the new century.

Anyways, I hope there are still places like this in the world. And someday- when I can relinquish my hold on our bank accounts, my blackberry, my laptop and my husband- I hope that I can find one. I will not work outside of the home, and Ian will be able to come home to a wife in heels and curls. A pot-roast will be in the oven, and our children ready for the daily routine. With it being the new year- I want to make this a resolution. Not for this year, or even for the next five. But in twenty- twenty years married and 20 years closer to how life and marriage was five decades ago.

I just needed to write that all down.

Thanks,

C

COLD COLD COLD

It is WAY TOO DAMN COLD OUTSIDE TO EVEN THINK ABOUT BLOGGING

Smoke Free 2009

Well, so far I haven't smoked a single cigarrette since New Years Eve 2008. I'm pretty impressed with myself and think I deserve a medal.

I've been smoking for eight years, so it's a huge accomplishment.

My district manager called me today just to ask if I was doing okay with the whole not smoking thing and if there was anything he could do to help.


That was the nicest thing ever. What other district manager would do that??! None I've ever had.

I told him that I loved him.

Okay I'm hungry now.

Dammit

Second round of clomid cost me 475 bucks and involved the side effects of : nervouseness, sweats, passing out once, dizzy spells, cramps, vomiting, fevers, irritability, blurred vision, hot flashes, and anger management issues.

And after ALL THAT, I get the news today that it didn't work at fucking all.

21 days after you start the rounds of fertility/hormone therapy the Dr's take a couple of vials of your blood. They do a test that can tell whether or not you ovulated. This test is based on a 9 point scale. 6-9 means you likely ovulated.

I scored a .04.

Make sure you see the POINT before the 04, because I would have at least been hopeful with a solid FOUR. However, a POINT 04 is not good.

It's safe to say I did not ovulate and I am a barren wasteland of a woman.

Dammit.